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The Absurdity of it All
This lump is the best thing that’s happened to me
It was a slap on the face, an insult! Yet, also a wake up call
You see, I had been dormant all this time, complacent,
And very comfortable with my life, as is. I existed, yet I was not
ALIVE! I was an automaton, on remote control, and
Focused solely on the comfort of my bodily form
Oh, there was a nagging little voice of malcontent
Which occasionally asked: “what is the meaning of it all?”
But I drowned it and subdued it with noise, drink, television,
Pseudo friends and lovers, who scattered when I lost it all!
I always thought that if I did what I was told, and what was
Considered the norm; I would be happy and loved
I woke up each day, dreading going to work and anxiously
Waiting for my time off. But you know, I made a good living
I did not pursue my dreams, for dreaming is for fools
Cold hard cash pays the rent, women, and booze
Yet, I was the fool all along. I was laid off and I lost
My identity, the bills piled sky high, and I thought…
That life was not worth living at all
Yet this thing here… do you want to feel it?
This cluster of malignant cells has shaken me to the core
I WANT TO LIVE! Oh, God how I want to live
I promise if you heal me, I will be a better human being
I won’t take for granted every single day. I will reach out to
Other' even if it’s just to say “Bless you” when they sneeze
I won’t hide in fear, cowardice, envy and hatred of others’
I will start fresh and find a way to create something
I have squandered my talents in the relentless pursue
Of the dollar; I was a sell out. But, Dear God, if you give
Me another chance, I will find the way to really LIVE well
I know I’m chicken shit to call on You today, when I’ve eluded and
Doubted You all these years. Now that I’m standing on the edge of
Ta precipice of a long, and deep fall, I want to believe that I
Won’t cease to exist, that my life has meaning! I promise to live
it well! Yet, I can’t believe the absurdity of it all
Why was I born in the first place? What is the meaning of it all?
Salvador Dali "dream-caused-by-the-flight-of-a-bee-around-a-pomegranate" c-1944
