Excerpt from: "Man, Woman, and Hunger" by Daina Chaviano
- What time is it ? asked the Mora.
- Fifteen past six. Nubia answered.
- So early, and I am hungry.
- Well girl, the only thing I can offer you today is the newest invention: Steak of grapefruit peel. If you want, I can give you the recipe.
- Thanks, must taste like crap.
- Be thankful I don’t offer you steak of floor mat.
The Mora observed her for a few moments.
- That is a metaphor, right?
- What metaphor bull shit! You think I make poetry of hunger? I’d have to be an imbecile…. One day there was a man offering steak sandwiches for sale. The steak was hard to chew on, especially the amount of threads that retained the teeth; many speculated it was simply low grade meat….
- But, how can people confuse a blanket with steak? That is impossible!
- Look at my steak of grapefruit peel…… Look at the grapefruit peel I bought. I boiled those so they become tender. Next I add lemon, and a drop of vinegar to camouflage the tartness, then I fry them in oil, and voila!
- Nubia, I’m sorry but this must taste like shit.
- Don’t complain, or I will serve you the blanket.
- You still haven’t told me, how the man got away with that.
- Must not have been difficult. The meat we are rationed is not much different from a cleaning cloth. It is very thin and fibrous.
- But the taste…
- Ah, the form and texture. Marx would have loved to live in this place. Surely he would have found new philosophical implications to expand on the theory of historic materialism.
- Nuvia, don’t joke.
- Ok, I will tell you.
- First, one must have the soul of an artist. You must cut the cloth to make it resemble a fillet of steak, the borders uneven, imitating the coast of a foreign country….The best outlines are those of Great Britain, or the Scandinavian Peninsula….
- What time is it ? asked the Mora.
- Fifteen past six. Nubia answered.
- So early, and I am hungry.
- Well girl, the only thing I can offer you today is the newest invention: Steak of grapefruit peel. If you want, I can give you the recipe.
- Thanks, must taste like crap.
- Be thankful I don’t offer you steak of floor mat.
The Mora observed her for a few moments.
- That is a metaphor, right?
- What metaphor bull shit! You think I make poetry of hunger? I’d have to be an imbecile…. One day there was a man offering steak sandwiches for sale. The steak was hard to chew on, especially the amount of threads that retained the teeth; many speculated it was simply low grade meat….
- But, how can people confuse a blanket with steak? That is impossible!
- Look at my steak of grapefruit peel…… Look at the grapefruit peel I bought. I boiled those so they become tender. Next I add lemon, and a drop of vinegar to camouflage the tartness, then I fry them in oil, and voila!
- Nubia, I’m sorry but this must taste like shit.
- Don’t complain, or I will serve you the blanket.
- You still haven’t told me, how the man got away with that.
- Must not have been difficult. The meat we are rationed is not much different from a cleaning cloth. It is very thin and fibrous.
- But the taste…
- Ah, the form and texture. Marx would have loved to live in this place. Surely he would have found new philosophical implications to expand on the theory of historic materialism.
- Nuvia, don’t joke.
- Ok, I will tell you.
- First, one must have the soul of an artist. You must cut the cloth to make it resemble a fillet of steak, the borders uneven, imitating the coast of a foreign country….The best outlines are those of Great Britain, or the Scandinavian Peninsula….
Upon obtaining the desired effect, the cloth is boiled with the purpose to smooth it, then it is marinated two, or three days in a mixture of vinegar and lemon, so the cloth is impregnated of an acid taste, destined to fool the palate. Ideally one adds garlic and onions the moment it is fried: that gives it the magic touch….
must be hidden between two slices of bread…the bread will reinforce the illusion…also will create the barrier so that the eye – harder to fool than the palate – does not identify the mystification………
Another great invention is “picadillo of banana peel” Here the ingenuity of the Cuban is showcased, capable of making of inedible fruit waste, into recyclable food. …..This endeavor has yet to be given due merit by the world’s ecological organizations.
The formula to create this vegetable picadillo is as follows: take several green banana peels from the one we call platano macho…
First you boil those….so they become soft, then they are mashed to resemble ground beef. This mass is seasoned with garlic, lemon and cooked with lots of tomato paste (if you find any)….
Another great invention is “picadillo of banana peel” Here the ingenuity of the Cuban is showcased, capable of making of inedible fruit waste, into recyclable food. …..This endeavor has yet to be given due merit by the world’s ecological organizations.
The formula to create this vegetable picadillo is as follows: take several green banana peels from the one we call platano macho…
First you boil those….so they become soft, then they are mashed to resemble ground beef. This mass is seasoned with garlic, lemon and cooked with lots of tomato paste (if you find any)….
.
There are other delicacies similar in style; all are folkloric and typical of the region. It is a pity they don’t show these to the tourists.
There are other delicacies similar in style; all are folkloric and typical of the region. It is a pity they don’t show these to the tourists.
"El hombre, la hembra y el hambre" Chaviano Daina 1998 Barcelona, editorial Platena S.A.
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The above may seem like fiction, yet I wonder. I have heard some weird stories.
For instance, there is an ambulant dentist, who extracts teeth without anesthesia, from a makeshift kiosk…cannot verify if this is true.
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The above may seem like fiction, yet I wonder. I have heard some weird stories.
For instance, there is an ambulant dentist, who extracts teeth without anesthesia, from a makeshift kiosk…cannot verify if this is true.
Also, when there is a wedding, the cake is simply an elaborate prop, or there is a breast bone from a turkey that is shared by neighboring families to create substance for soup.
Next Thanksgiving, when Big Bird is presented upon the altar of your table, stuffed and baked to a crisp, let us reflect on the many reasons we have to be thankful for, living with so much abundance.
Next Thanksgiving, when Big Bird is presented upon the altar of your table, stuffed and baked to a crisp, let us reflect on the many reasons we have to be thankful for, living with so much abundance.
There is so much abundance that, discarding valuable objects and people is the norm - much easier than recycling those.
I think I will attempt to make the banana concoction for Thanksgiving. Will not use a banana peel - I don’t have to be that extreme - will use a couple of soy patties instead.
That is exactly the very reason for being thankful.
I think I will attempt to make the banana concoction for Thanksgiving. Will not use a banana peel - I don’t have to be that extreme - will use a couple of soy patties instead.
That is exactly the very reason for being thankful.
